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Sunday, June 19, 2011 0


From a conversation with the same individual who sparked the sunglasses post comes another touchy subject. The behavior of some on what should be a jolly night out.

Clubbing is fun, however there always seems to be evil in the room, somewhere, hiding, lurking...  It's, the enemy within...the 'caring friend'.You're telling a hilarious  joke, the other person finds it funny, and here comes the superhero friend to drag them away. Perhaps you've managed to evade the 'caring friend' so far (they've been caught slipping having gone to wash some spilled alcohol from their superhero gloves). Don't get your hopes up though. The moment you go in for that playful dance, in comes this monster. They tend to adopt more cunning tactics on such situations however. Knowing it's unlikely anyone will take kindly to being dragged whilst dancing they typically deploy the 'Sista Dance'.It starts with a slow pivot to the groove towards the friend--as to catch you off guard. Their friend hasn't noticed either. You're still dancing together. Until in comes the caring hands wrapping the friend, pulling them close,then the 'Sista Dance' begins with a friend on friend grind. You've been skillfully isolated. Your night is over. A kebab is the only joy to be had tonight.

Surely this is just being a good friend? Perhaps....but I've always had my doubts. Then,thankfully, my female consultant confirmed my suspicions. These actions are usually motivated by one of the following hues of green envy. It could be slight--they secretly envy your allure. Maybe it's moderate jealously because they'd like the same done to them. The most vile form of green eyed envy occurs when the 'caring friend' fancies a bit of THAT  particular person coming in for a pleasant tête-à-tête with their friend. On such occasions they pull out all the stops: pushing, pulling, stories about bogus boyfriends, imagined lesbianism etc. etc. Indeed, these tricks aren't confined to jealous women, guys seem at it too. Students should look out for the 'caring male flatmate'. Admittedly,he is occasionally required to deflect total creeps, however he likes to take on extra roles. Stepping way outside his remit, the'caring male flatmate' ushers away any guy breathing in the close proximity of his female flatmate in the hope that his kindness will one day be remembered and rewarded generously. 

Unfortunately,it's highly unlikely that this problem will end. As long as the night club exists so will the 'caring friend' with his or her superhero powers. I guess all one can do is document it, in the hope that such people see the errors of their ways. 

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